Dealing with impasse over $'s
At a recent seminar I heard a complaint about mediation voiced by an attorney who bemoaned the cost in time and money to her client when she asks for $100K and the counter-offer was $2,500 and neither side budged no matter how many hours are spent in the mediation. I didn’t hear too many great suggestions. The next time I was tested in this manner I asked, “How do you expect me to bridge this gap.” Response, “that’s your job.” Great!
Why do clients come in with such
divergent views. Some time ago I gave up trying to understand when I asked
“where did you get that number?” Answer –“I pulled it out of the air”. That
attorney left the mediation for a preposterous reason, leaving his client to
face a declaration of impasse by her
So, this time I suggested “let’s not waste our time and why don’t we go home so you can get your case ready for trial?” That changed the dynamics in the mediation real quick. Lucky stroke? In this particular case, yes. Sometimes circumstances dictate a quick retreat from seeming impasse. What else can I do? Well, one thing I know for sure and, that is, even though the clients may initially not mention there is money involved, ask them. There’s nothing worse then spending hours negotiating on everything but money and then find out there are these extremely divergent amounts being requested and counter-offered. By that time the parties are exhausted and you can’t get anywhere. Sometimes it’s the seemingly nicest and most gentle negotiators who lead a negotiation down this path. Maybe it’s their negotiating strategy.
At times a party hasn’t even thought about the money because of emotions involved in other issues. They need time to think about money during the negotiation, but they need the issue on the table early on. Of course there are cases like neighbor disputes which don’t involve money but many cases if not most, do.
Then there are the more tricky
ones like when it comes to workplace discrimination where an employees demand is
ridiculously low, lost (minimum) wages, and they totally believe in their case,
while the employer doesn’t buy either the demand for money or the case
it
If it’s about the money deal with it. The rest follows, is often the rule in cases involving money and other issues. Don’t declare impasse without knowing there’s a money demand because money can often soften a lot of pain. Maybe, it’s the American way.
